Post by robert janice bratus on May 3, 2013 20:47:47 GMT
robert janice bratus
Hey, my name is... Robert Janice Bratus.
But most call me... Rob, Robbie, Bertie, Roberto, Jan, 'that crazy guy'
If you want to, you can label me... pansexual
I've been on this earth for... 71 years, if it really matters...
Which means I was born... on the 21st October, or something?
I'm a... local
And only a... local resident
My eyes are... grey
And my hair is... brown (and quite possibly the best hair ever, not that I'm bragging)
One could say... that I'm semi-tall, perhaps a tad on the skinny side, and have amazing hair.
I'm normally seen wearing... literally anything I can find, which leads to issues as, y'know, it could be a dress or a skirt or anything.
And I supposedly look like... Dave Keuning
All round, I'm... a lovely, brilliant guy, with great hair. What else can I really say? Okay, so I'm pretty friendly, which seems to creep certain people out a bit. I'm not overly forward or anything, really; some people just seem to hate me- they must be jealous of my hair. Can't say I blame them, really. Still, even if someone hates me, it's very, very rare I'll hate them back. I can't hold grudges that well, just because it seems like it's really not worth the effort. In fact, the only time I'd ever shout at anyone is if they insulted the way I look, so as long as you don't do that, we'll get along just fine.
So yeah, I'm a pretty laid-back dude: I tend not to take too many things seriously (only really my guitar-playing) and I've just decided to take things as they come. Yep, things are easy enough for me right now, and it's brilliant.
I'm in love with... guitars (especially my own, Brian), dogs, my hair, water... and, uh, beer.
Though I detest... people touching my hair, cats, annoying people, early mornings, spicy food, and pathetic haircuts.
But my best assets are... my hair, because it's amazing, and my dog, because his hair's nearly as good as mine. Nearly.
However my worst... are my ability to speak my mind at extremely inconvenient times, and my attachment to alcohol; it's just unhealthy.
And I dream of... ...wait, people still have dreams? Well, I guess it would be pretty awesome for everyone to realise that my hair is the best in the world.
My life story... ...well, I guess it all started when I was born. My parents were nice enough to me; they were like all good parents should be, not that I exactly have much to go on. Still, I had a good enough education- yes, I was the bottom of practically every class and got kicked out of school at least four times for various things I won't mention- but I knew how to read, write and do basic maths when I left school, which was good enough for me.
After I'd graduated, I wasted roughly thirty years of my life pottering around, doing a lot of nothing and not much else. I'd learnt quickly enough that the only thing I could really do with any skill was play the guitar, and it seemed to me like that wouldn't really be much good to me: I mean, who would employ a bloke just because he could play guitar (and because he had amazing hair, although it was ever so slightly less amazing at that point)?
It was roughly when I was 47 years old that me and a guy under the name of Brent McKinney decided to form a band. Along with the assistance of Bradley and Stuart, we formed the Genius Sex Poets- and did pretty well for ourselves. I even managed to move out of my parent's house and into a flat-they were so proud. At least things were good for the eight years we were together. I'm not sure entirely whose fault it was that we disbanded, but I'm certainly not blaming myself for it.
A far briefer version of what happened is that basically, Brad and Brent were in a relationship and I may or may not have ruined it. Look, me and Brent had a one-night stand and yes, Brad found out about it. The band separated soon after and I'm pretty sure it was generally concluded the split was my fault, but I'm blaming it on Brent. Believe me, it wasn't my fault. I was drunker than usual, so the blame simply can't be pinned on me.
After the best eight years of my life, I went from doing really well to being the lowest of the low. I'd previously shared a flat with Stuart, but he kicked me out, so I had to find the cheapest accommodation possible with the money I hadn't wasted on beer, which wasn't exactly much to say the least. Still, I'm doing a lot better now than I have in the past, over fifteen years on from the breakup; people ought to be proud that I went through such a low point and came through with my hair still looking this good. Not many people could manage that, I'm sure.
I was born to... Annabel and Stephen Bratus
Not to mention... my amazing little Bergamasco Shepherd, Clifford.
My ooc name is... Nell
And I've been roleplaying... Six months
The Secret Word is... PASSWORD ACCEPTED
